Thursday, November 27, 2008

金山行

金山比不上什么名山大川,有什么好谈的呢?

泰山贵为五岳之尊,秦皇汉武曾经在此封天禅地,凌绝顶,度沧海。黄山归来不看山,泰山归来不看岳,金山在马来西亚柔佛与马六甲的边界,高不过一千米,不是奇峰异石,也不格外陡峻。无限风光在险峰?还差得远呢!

山不在高,有仙则灵。金山的神仙到底在何处?

第一次上金山,年方二十一,风华正茂,正因为不知天高地厚,也上得最辛苦,不晓得节省体力,结果老早就漏气了。勉勉强强登上顶峰,花了整七个小时。



这群上山的朋友在工院中文协会相知相遇,毕业后大家为了保持一个完美的回忆,他日倘若再相见,必定把时代推得更前!赤子之心,最纯真无邪,最青涩,也最美。

第二次上金山,年方二十二,意气蓬勃,与六位军友临别秋波,让他们以爬山的形式来为我践行,标新立异。这次竟然迷了路,浪费了六个小时与体力,只能在半山腰扎营过夜,半夜还碰到一只类似狐狸的红皮动物来偷食物。当时艺高人胆大,可没想过害怕。这趟旅程最值得回味的并非人在征途上,而是在山林中找出路的六个小时。



第三次上金山,年已二十五,在社会上正正式式的混了将近三年,碰了一鼻子灰,对人生对人性都感到极度困扰,想起庄子的逍遥游,也想随他乘风归去,独与天地往来。不过假期也不过那三两天,金山是最好的选择。这回只跟赐福和志明登山,上山下山只花了不到七个小时,也许是早已累积了登山经验的关系吧?我们已经晓得如何避重就轻,让体力与精神融为一体。



第四次上金山,年已二十九,那时刚在南洋理工大学修完三年课,那三年的日子骑虎难下,但既然作了重回校园的选择,只好咬紧牙关,一步一脚印。挨完了,心情也轻松了,一切的付出都变得值得。这群登山的朋友整二十人,我原只认识两人。相知相遇便是朋友,又何必去计较?这时所享受的是登山的过程,不再与时间赛跑了。行到水穷处,坐看云起时,第二天清晨迎着朝阳,世界多美好。原来不去计较得失,得多过失!



第五次上金山,年已三十,跟一群南洋理工大学中文学会的朋友。南洋理工那三年,我是禅心已作飞泥絮,怎么跟中文学会的朋友来往了?其实是通过健茂。世人熙熙,皆为利来,世人攘攘,皆为利往,非仁非智。仁者乐山,智者乐水,金山有山也有水,正符合我当时的追求。今生今世我们的心可以遨游到多远?



第六次上金山,年已三十九,有心无力,只能在另一个山头爬起,偷工减料。我们都拖儿携女,儿女年幼,气力不济,登山危险。儿女成为我们的藉口。站在山峰隐隐约约有把声音说这该是你的最后一次了。不禁念天地之悠悠,独仓然而泪下。



第一次1982年,第六次2000年,前后跨了一个世纪。流光一逝二十八载,红了樱桃,绿了芭蕉。对外在世界多了宽容感恩,胜过把时代推得更前那华而不实的豪语。

金山虽然不是名山大川,千里之行,源于足下。它伴随着我的青春岁月,陪我走入中年。它教我在自然中超越自我,脚踏峰顶一块实地,头顶一片自在蓝天,天地人融为一体,原来可以穿越时空!千古尘埃是自找的,既然由来无一物,又从何处惹尘埃?

山不在高,有仙则灵。仙在何处?仙在我心。

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Before sunset

Read the article “城市空间”by Soo Hoon. It strikes my memories of the great cities. I asked her which cities impressed her most. She said, “Paris, Geneva, Berne. These cities did well in preserving the eco-systems. In comparison, we destructed many old architectures. In the process of demolishing, we also destroyed memories. For example, the red brick national library.”

It reminded me how I was emotionally lost for quite some time, graving about the tearing down of the red brick national library then. It was my childhood, my student days, my growing up years. It also accompanied the growth of many other people. Just because somebody drew a baseless conclusion, saying that it had no historic value. Bang! Door closed. In the next moment, our memories were sent to graveyard.

I like to stroll at the river bank of Seine, Paris. Palm trees situated along the river banks in addition to the old book stores, infamous artists, crowd and romance.


Paris is small, no corner is farther than 10km from the square in front of Notre-Dame Cathedral. The old buildings, the riverboats, the changes of colour reflected by the water, the gardens, and the 32 handsome bridges compose one of the world's finest, grandness and yet most endearing cityscapes in the contemporary world. Palais de Chaillot, Eiffel Tower, Champ-de-Mars, Ecole Militaire, Invalides....

Oh yes. Remember Before Sun Set (2004)? Director Richard Linklater, Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy collaborated for Before Sunrise (1995) and again in 2004. Inspirational love story.

It's 9 years later. Jesse (Ethan Hawke) has written a book about his one night in Vienna with Celine (Julie Delpy). He is on a promotion tour of European cities, last stop: Paris. Jesse is promoting his book in the Shakespeare & Co. bookshop. Celine has read his book and, as she is a regular patron of the bookshop, is aware that Jesse will be in town. Just as his talk is coming to an end, she appears ethereally at the window. They go out for coffee and spend the rest of the day catching up on each other's lives. But really they are just picking up what they left in 1995.

In Before Sunrise when Jesse persuades Celine to get off the train with him and spend the night in Vienna. Before Sunset fulfills that "what if", a decade later when Celine is stuck in a relationship that is not really fulfilling; and she thinks back to what could have been if she'd stuck with that guy she met all those years ago...

Jesse and Celine are so much into each other that they barely notice the Paris streets and parks they walk through. Time seems more precious than their first meeting, which seemed suspended in a timeless bliss. Their time together is limited. The entire film is like those delicious last moments of a conversation where both of you are dallying; neither wants to put an end to it because, in a way, that will be a rejection of the other person.

Paris has thought me that life is not perfect. Because of imperfection, with regret and you need a greater tolerance to overcome it, life becomes beautiful and real.

But the grand and romantic Paris is not my dream city. My heart goes to London. Camden Town of London.



Why? The answer is indeed very simple. Because of Memories. City needs memories. Memory is a soft art that touches people's heart. Camden Town was the first foreign town that I called it a home. It helped me to realise one of my childhood dreams. At that time, my wife just married to me and followed me to this strange city that she'd never been, and stayed with me for one full year. We built our home. We gave born to our first child.... We created our very own grandness and fondness memories.

Deep in our heart we are finding a living space which calls home. To me,"城市空间"is really about memories, about affection to our memories.

Hence, every return to London and before sunset, I would spend time in Camden Town. Because it is unique, it is special. It is my memories.